


sleeping here instead

by lestered (lgbtrobed)



Series: whistle while you work [2]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Psychic Abilities
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-23
Updated: 2020-06-23
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:15:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24878299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lgbtrobed/pseuds/lestered
Summary: “Right, I know you’re trying to win her over with the cool stepdad act,” Dan says, “but are you ever gonna be on my side? She already loves you. I think finding a human who speaks cat was enough of a perk.”
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Series: whistle while you work [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1799599
Comments: 14
Kudos: 74





	sleeping here instead

**Author's Note:**

> read part one [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23242120) first if you haven't already!

Dan wakes to a gentle tapping on the window that he thinks is the rain, at first. It’s been a rainy month in London, not that he minds. He sighs and smiles, ready to be soothed back to sleep by it.

He’s only been awake about ten seconds before he realizes that the tapping is not, in fact, the pitter-patter of a quiet rain shower. The tapping is too loud, too inconsistent, too individual. He squeezes his eyes shut and groans in frustration when he realizes what it actually is.

“Phil!” He yells as soon as he hears the telltale _coo_ confirming his suspicion. “Your stupid fucking pigeons are here again!” The sound of a cupboard door opening down the hall lets him know that Phil is in the kitchen, not in bed next to him, so he doesn’t have to feel bad about being loud - not that he often does, anyway. 

“Don’t call them stupid!” Phil yells back, his voice getting clearer as he pads down the hallway and into the bedroom, bag of birdseed in hand. He doesn’t spare Dan so much as a glance before hurrying over to the sliding glass door. “Sorry, guys,” Dan hears him say as he steps out onto the balcony. “I meant to refill this last night. Here you go.” There’s the noise of Phil shaking some seed into the bird feeder and a couple more _coos_ before he steps back inside, sliding the door closed behind him and crossing his arms when he turns his gaze on Dan, finally. 

“They have names, you know,” he says in a calm, stern voice. “Steve and Paul.”

“Oh?” Dan rolls his eyes and props himself up on his elbows. “Did they tell you that?” 

Phil tilts his head to the side. “What? No,” he says, like it’s obvious. “Animals don’t name themselves. They just know that’s how I tell them apart.” There’s a hint of a smirk playing on his lips as he approaches the bed, slipping back under the covers and pressing himself along Dan’s side. “What are you so grumpy about this morning, anyway?” He asks. “Jealous that the pigeons are getting more attention than you?”

He closes his eyes when Phil leans in closer, parting his lips and letting him catch his mouth in a slow, deep kiss. He can’t help but moan a little, arching up and wrapping his arms around Phil’s shoulders. He blinks his eyes open slowly when they break apart, only to scowl when he sees Phil’s amused expression. He’s not really upset, though. Phil comes with his own very unique lifestyle and set of quirks, but it’s hard for Dan to find fault in the fact that he’s essentially dating a real-life, male Snow White.

“You’re really lucky you’re cute, you know,” he says softly.

Phil’s eyes twinkle adorably. “You should be nice to me. I was making you breakfast before the pidgey bros showed up.”

“Please don’t call them that,” Dan reaches up and brushes a droopy bit of Phil’s quiff off his forehead. “You were?”

“Well, coffee and cereal,” Phil clarifies. “Come on.”

*

“Luna wants you to go back to buying the chicken flavoured treats,” Phil says later, out of pretty much nowhere. “Stop just buying whatever’s on sale thinking that she won’t know the difference. She said you’d know what that means.”

Dan, from his seat at the breakfast bar, very slowly lowers his phone away from his face.

Phil’s not even facing him; he’s stood at the stove, cooking pasta for dinner while Luna sits calm and still on the counter beside him. She, however, _is_ looking at Dan with a very matter-of-fact expression, if that’s even possible for a cat. She blinks at him, he blinks back at her. 

Then she meows.

Phil doesn’t miss a beat, just casting her a quick glance as he sprinkles some salt into the boiling water. “The tuna flavour is especially subpar,” he translates. 

Supposedly.

“Right, I know you’re trying to win her over with the cool stepdad act,” Dan says, “but are you ever gonna be on my side? She already loves you. I think finding a human who speaks cat was enough of a perk.”

“I don’t take sides,” Phil insists, “I just relay the information.” He gives the pasta one last stir before turning off the hob and dumping the contents of the pot into the strainer that’s waiting in the sink.

“Well,” he adds after a moment of pause, turning around and leaning back against the counter, “usually. I’m with her this time; you know we can’t have her developing a taste for fish.”

Right, Norman. That had been the biggest concern when Dan had started bringing Luna along on his overnights, arguing that it wasn’t fair to leave her alone so often, and Phil simply couldn’t disagree. Still, her remaining uninterested in Phil’s fish son is a top priority. 

It’s bizarre, he thinks as he watches Luna strut across the counter to her food bowl at the other end, how much his life has changed in just over a month’s time. It’s still a little jarring when he thinks about it.

It must show in his expression because Phil approaches, standing across from him at the breakfast bar and sliding his hands to the middle. Dan sets his phone down and reaches out, letting Phil hold his hands in a gentle grasp. 

“What are you thinking about?”

Dan tilts his head a little. “Just wondering if you’re real or not,” he says lightly. Phil’s thumbs brush gently over his knuckles.

Phil raises his eyebrows, letting go and rounding the breakfast bar. “Could a figment of your imagination do this?” He asks, cupping Dan’s cheeks and waiting for him to tilt his head back before pecking his lips once, then again, then giving Dan’s bottom lip a gentle bite.

“Mm,” Dan hums into it, “probably. I was pretty touch starved when I met you.” He smiles into their next kiss, then pulls back. “Give me a break, I didn’t think I’d meet a very hot guy who would also rock my entire worldview. Thought it’d be one or the other, at most.”

“Oh. You’re a sap,” Phil nods, twirling one of Dan’s curls around his finger before letting it bounce back. “Noted. I’ll take it easy on you.”

“Remember this morning, when I said you’re really lucky you’re cute? That’s relevant again.”

He’s about to lean in for another kiss when he’s startled by a loud meow from across the room. Phil huffs out a laugh, opening his eyes and draping his arms around Dan’s shoulders. “She said _get a room.”_

“The attitude,” Dan murmurs with a fond shake of his head. “Honestly.” Still, he eyes Phil up and down, reaching out for his waist and tugging him closer. “You want to?” He asks. “I can wait a while for dinner.”

Phil kisses him again, hot and heavy and purposeful and then he’s practically chasing him down the hall toward the bedroom, breathless and laughing. 

“Oh!” Phil halts suddenly, turning around and Dan _just_ manages to stop short of plowing him over. “We have to be quick, though,” he informs him. “Paul and Steve are gonna be back for dinner around five and they might bring some friends.”

Dan knows, in his logical brain, that he should be dumbfounded about that. Maybe even a little indignant. But that can also wait for later, he decides. The look on Phil’s face when he takes his hand to tug him the rest of the rest of the way is just too precious.

And time, apparently, is of the essence.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!
> 
> hmu on tumblr @lestered
> 
> reblogs are appreciated, you can do that [here](https://lestered.tumblr.com/post/621727778316976128/sleeping-here-instead-g-13k-right-i-know) <3


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